My Wriggler is nearly 17 months old, running and falling everywhere and gaining new words on a regular basis (although the current favourite word is car, yelled loudly and repeatedly…currently week 10 of this favourite word. I am pushing for duck to be the next one…looks like it will either be GOAL or NO!!!!).
This word…”pushing”…I am directing his development and achievements (peeing on the Dr, admittedly, was not one of them). Whilst it is great to be so involved with your child’s developments and achievements, it is not, nor should it ever be, a competition. Yet, why when I am with some of my lovely mummy friends do I find myself questioning if I am doing things right, enough, has my wriggler done things as he should, am I a bad mother?
It is natural for every parent to worry about their skills and if they are doing the right or the best thing. And every parent also possesses their own style of parenting, the ‘yes-to-everything-my –child-wants’, the ‘never-have-anything-chocolate-based’, the ‘run-at-the-slightest-bump-and-cuddle’ and the ‘opps-pick-yourself-up’ brigades…There is essentially nothing wrong with finding your own way, and adapting it to your own child.
My mother often reminds me (and appears to forget that this must be the millionth time I have heard this story) that, whilst I needed a stern voice to be told off, my sister just needed a ‘look’…my brother needed lockdown (apologies Mummy-dear for paraphrasing!!).
Each child has their own personality and development speeds, so whilst I may love that Wriggler has a collection of 20-25 ‘words’ and he can walk…he can be a cheeky monkey at mealtimes…not fussy…just likes to take his time. A very long time most mealtimes – which is my source of worry. Compared to his little friends, they eat like champs and I naturally wonder what on earth I am doing wrong??
I have decided that he is a social eater…in that he sees mealtimes as the time to sit and chat and take his time on eating, which I hope he actually does keep doing as it might bode well for him telling me about his day when he is older.
My next worry… am I really so bad to give him chocolate on occasion?