How to talk about pregnancy with siblings

We introduced Wriggler to the idea of becoming a big brother by taking him to our 12-week ultrasound. We had an ultrasound at eight weeks and were confident that things were ok, nonetheless we did get the sonographer to check me over before letting the new big brother in to see what on earth was going on. He wasn’t even two and he was amazed and so proud. He couldn’t wait to meet his ‘brother-sister’ and so we got a book – I’m a new big brother: a Pirate Pete book – and talked about it over the next six months.

In the final months leading up to the arrival we sorted his room, got him his ‘big boy bed’, talked about potty training (but as he wasn’t ready didn’t push it) and read his book about what great things big brothers did. So, when we brought Fidget home, Wriggler was so happy and welcomed him with the full force of his love.

So, what are my top tips for talking about pregnancy with siblings and helping them prepare for the transition?

  1. Involve them by helping identify their new relationship with the baby and role they can play
  2. Show pictures of the baby
  3. Let them ask questions
  4. Let them feel the baby’s kicks
  5. Talk about how things will be when the baby comes – like that the baby won’t play much at first
  6. Make sure you have plans for what exciting things will be kept for just them – as the older sibling
  7. And if they don’t want to talk about it, then allow them that space – a sibling is a massive change, and sometimes it is best that they get their frustrations out before bubs arrives rather than afterwards

We have told the boys about the new baby – they have seen the scan pictures, been to my midwife appointments and heard the heartbeat and rubbed my tummy a lot. At the moment they are both pretty excited – hope it stays that way and they accept and love the new addition – I’ll definitely be trying the tips from above again!

What things did you guys find helped with introducing the pregnancy, or do you have any horror stories to share!?!

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